Twidders

Reaction to France’s World Cup win
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She is that annoying voice that I have carried with me for so many years — from my childhood, my teens and to now, on the verge of turning Now is the time to start ignoring her, to drown out her remarks and live my life the way I should. I sometimes feel like I should start working from the toilet on the worst of days.

The amount of time I spend in there is silly, really. The pressure I put on myself to be quick only makes matters worse. Oh, how I envy people who can be in and out to do there business in 5 minutes or less — you people are my idols. But, I think that it is time to stop giving myself such a hard time. To some extent, I can control my IBS. And sometimes it takes a while — Sorry about it.

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So, this is me being open and honest and telling the damn internet that I have IBS. I am not going to get angry with myself any more. Sometimes you just have to accept your flaws and role with it, right? I hope that I am strong enough to get though it. Does anyone else struggle to accept themselves? Does anyone else overthink every single thing to the point it drives them crazy? Does anyone else have a hard time figuring out who they are? For many months I have been anxious and trying to keep a lid on it as best I can.

Although there have been times when I have slipped up and freaked out — moments I am not proud of. These moments have shown my inability to keep my emotions under control. I have also decided that I need to address my OCD issues. For years I have let my obsession with germs get worse.

I should have tried to get help for this ages ago, but I never felt brave enough. I never wanted to accept I have a problem, but it is clear that I do when my hands are so dry no matter how much moisturiser I use. I had to clean and clean until my racing heart slowed down and the panic subsided. I have found myself buying packs of antibacterial wipes to ensure the kitchen or bathroom were clean.

There was a phase where I would clean the bathroom and kitchen every single day because they never seemed cleaned enough. I remember a time when I never gave germs a second thought and I miss that. When I realise how much energy I have wasted on believing there are germs everywhere that need cleaning away, I feel very disappointed in myself.

I need support to get out of this mindset, but I know it will take time. My other problem is my self esteem. I keep doubting myself.

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I keep looking in the mirror and hating everything I see. I look at other women in awe because they are so beautiful. I have that voice that keeps telling me I am useless. I keep trying to ignore it. I keep trying to believe otherwise. But over and over again I feel ugly and stupid. Menu Skip to content Home About.

Search for:. F x Advertisements. I have definitely had better weeks. So, mentally I was stuck. I have a friend that insults me every single day. Most days, she tells me I have shit hair and that I am stupid. She loves to remind me of all my past mistakes. She likes to hold me back because she thinks it is better to do nothing. She is a total bitch.

But, this friend I cannot ignore so easily. Fuck you, friend. Visit Help Center.

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